My Mother's Revenge Book

My mom keeps a list of grievances.

On one side, she records the expenses of raising me, and on the other, she notes my disobedience.

In her book, I have all sorts of names.

Burden, brat, ungrateful child...

While she hopes for my success, she also wishes for my demise.

Eventually, I did die.

I left her with a hollow shell, and a bank card with eighty thousand dollars.

Mom, I returned both money and life to you.

Are you satisfied now?

...

The day before New Year's Eve, a heavy snowstorm hit.

After struggling to knock on the door, my mom appeared with Rhys.

Rhys is my cousin, three days younger than me. After my uncle and aunt died in a car accident, she was raised in our home.

My parents love her dearly.

Really, really love her.

Seeing my appearance, my mom sneered.

"You're no intellectual, so why wear glasses like one? No matter how you pretend to be demure, you're just a pretentious flirt!"

It seemed like she had given me a new nickname.

She has a list of grievances.

On one side, it records the expenses of raising me, and on the other, my acts of defiance.

In that book, I have all sorts of names.

Burden, brat, ungrateful child... and now, a pretentious flirt.

Snow trickled down my face, and my limbs were numb from the cold.

Yet they stood at the door, critiquing me as if I were a defective product.

It wasn't until my dad emerged from the kitchen, smelling like a kitchen, that he pulled me inside.

He wiped his face, handed me his apron, and said, "Why are you so late? Don't just stand there, hurry and cook!"

The kitchen door closed behind me.

The roar of the extractor fan filled the air, but it couldn't drown out their laughter.

To my ears, it was like a drumbeat, pounding in my chest.

Suddenly, my hand slipped.

A bottle of soy sauce crashed to the ground.

The sound of shattering glass was followed by my mom rushing in.

Without a word, she slapped me across the face!

"Kiera! Can't you even manage to cook? Why the tantrum? What's with the long face? Who are you trying to impress?"

Mom, you're right. I'm almost dead.

My glasses fell to the floor, and my vision blurred.

As I groped for them, the broken bottle cut my fingers, while my mom continued her tirade.

"If you don't want to come back, then don't. Am I holding you back from earning a living? You act like I owe you a fortune!"

I put my glasses back on, stood up, and wiped the blood on my apron.

I spoke quietly.

"Mom? Who doesn't want to come home during the holidays? Is it me who doesn't want to return? You don't give me living expenses. If I don't work outside, how will I pay for school?"

"And I'm not throwing a tantrum or pretending to be demure. I'm just sick... "

Mom, I'm sick, with late-stage brain cancer.

The tumor has affected my nerves, impairing my vision and movement.

But my mom didn't let me finish.

"Enough with the sickness talk! It's inauspicious to talk about illness during the New Year! If I had known, I wouldn't have let you come back!"

I forced a bitter smile. "I'm already here, let's just endure it."

My mom let out a shriek, her freshly painted red nails scraped across my cheek.

"Old Chen! Look at your daughter! As a daughter, she tells her mother to endure her! How long do I have to put up with this... "

Until I die.

I wiped the blood from my cheek and sighed inwardly.

That 'endure it' wasn't meant for my mom.

I was telling myself to endure.

I've lived like this for twenty-two years; a few more days won't matter.

Once I'm gone, there'll be nothing to endure.

My dad and Laurie coaxed my mom into the bedroom.

I rinsed my injured fingers under the tap and continued cooking.

Once the meal was ready, the family sat down.

My dad served everyone sweet and sour ribs.

But I returned my portion to him.

For the past six months, painkillers have ruined my stomach.

Now I can only eat plain porridge and vegetables.

My mom slammed her chopsticks on the table.

"Kiera! What are you trying to prove? Is your family starving you?"

My dad frowned, "Kiera, why do you upset your mom as soon as you get back? Can't we just have a meal together? Didn't you used to love sweet and sour ribs? Why not eat them now?"

Dad, I want to eat.

But if I do, I'll throw up.

Laurie added fuel to the fire, "Uncle, maybe my sister has found better food outside and doesn't like ribs anymore."

My mom glanced at me with disdain.

"You are so willful. When you want, you eat a whole dish. When you don't, you won't touch it!"

The idea that I could eat a whole dish of ribs was Laurie's doing.

I lived with my uncle's family for eight years.

During those years, my mom only brought me back to the county during winter and summer breaks.

Laurie loved sweet and sour ribs, so my aunt made them often.

But no matter how many times she made them, I never got a piece.

Getting some sauce with rice was the biggest favor she did me.

I never complained; instead, every time my aunt made the dish, I would sneak into the kitchen to learn.

I found it delicious and wanted to make it for my mom.

My aunt wasn't pleased and would scold me each time.

"Why are you so greedy? Like a stray dog drawn to scraps! Dogs eat filth, will you?"

Her words were harsh, but I endured to learn cooking.

Finally, when break came, Laurie and I were taken home by my mom.

I proudly cooked sweet and sour ribs for my mom.

She ate, pleased, saying, "Seems like your aunt didn't mistreat you. This is good, you must have eaten plenty."

That day, I finally got two pieces of meat.

I ate slowly, savoring the taste.

Seeing this, my mom suddenly frowned, knocking the meat from my hand.

"Kiera! Has your aunt pampered you too much? Are you sick of ribs?"

Before I could cry, Laurie started to weep.

"Aunt, my mom favors my sister. Every time, she gets a whole dish of ribs, and I only get one piece... "

I stood there, dumbfounded.

My mom didn't let me explain.

She gave the whole dish to Laurie.

Not even leaving me the sauce...

My father, fearing my mother's anger, passed the ribs to me.

I closed my eyes and bit down hard.

Despite chewing thoroughly, when the meat slid down my esophagus, it felt like swallowing shards of glass.

The burning pain was intense.

My stomach began to reject the small piece of meat, pushing it back.

I took a deep breath, telling myself to endure and not to vomit.

Meanwhile, my mother watched my tightly pressed lips and placed the better dishes in front of Rhys.

"Laurie, come on, if she won't eat, we will!"

I sighed.

How pathetic I was.

I had hoped to celebrate the holiday joyfully with them, leaving them with a fond memory even if I were to pass away.

But it seems they might hate me even more now.

My mother ate the meat angrily, and her chewing made me nauseous again.

With the stomach pain pulling at me, a headache surged over me like a tidal wave.

"If I knew you were so heartless, I should have had another child back then... " my mother's mouth never stopped complaining.

Struggling against the pain, I blurted out without thinking, "Didn't you try to have another one?"

When I was six, my mother was pregnant with a second child. To nurture the pregnancy, she sent me to live with my uncle.

But after four months, the male fetus stopped developing.

The doctor said my mother had Rh-negative blood; the first pregnancy usually wasn't an issue, but the chances of blood incompatibility issues were high with a second.

I remember after the miscarriage, my mom came to my uncle's house.

I thought she was there to take me home and ran to her with a smile.

Instead, she slapped me twice, twisted my ear, and threw me into my aunt's barn.

The neatly stacked piles scattered, and dried corn rained down on me, burying me in an instant.

But my mom didn't pull me out; she just kept cursing.

"Kiera! You're so clever, rushing to be born! If your brother had your instincts and made it as the first child, his life would have been saved! How could you be so wicked!"

That day, when my aunt and father dug me out of the corn pile, my face was purple, and three fingers were broken.

I was taken to the town hospital, but my mother didn't glance at me and went straight back to the county.

She refused to bring me back to her side, leaving me in the care of my uncle and aunt.

My words drove my mother to madness.

She overturned the table, weeping uncontrollably.

Rhys was by her side, trembling with grief.

"Kiera! What kind of heart do you have? You've already caused the death of my parents and brother, and now you want to anger Aunt and Uncle to death too? Will that satisfy you? Do you even have the semblance of a child? How can you be so cruel?"

See, how loathed and unnecessary I am!

I arrived in my mother's belly first, preventing my younger brother from surviving.

Then I became a girl who spent money like water, had a scandalous personal life, and wanted to elope with someone during middle school!

And it was during that elopement attempt that my uncle, aunt, and cousin died in a car accident while trying to stop me, losing their lives in their prime.

I was in the car too, but I survived despite being severely injured.

When I woke up, I wasn't greeted with my mother's relieved embrace.

She pulled out my oxygen tube, removed my IV, and slapped me countless times.

"Vile girl! You wretch! Because of you, the family name and legacy are gone! Why wasn't it you who died? Why wasn't it?"

At that moment, I wished it had been me who died.

Yet I continued to live, struggling on, even if my life was worse than a stray dog's.

Mom, you've endured for so many years.

It's been hard on you, truly exhausting.

There was no way I was going to have any of that meal.

My dad decided to make noodles for themselves, leaving me out.

They ate at the coffee table while I silently cleaned up the spilled food.

The phone rang.

I glanced at it, picked it up, and went to the balcony.

It was my primary doctor calling.

"Kiera, are you sure you want to give up treatment? Even though it's late-stage, we can still try, at least to ease your pain... "

"Professor Huang, I can't afford it, " I declined directly.

Silence followed from the other end.

I whispered, "Professor Huang, thank you... but I've really decided to give up. Also, about the paid organ donation I asked you about last time... "

Professor Huang sighed, "For a donation involving multiple organs like yours, the legal compensation can reach over a million. If the recipient is willing, it could be even more... "

"I only need eight hundred thousand."

Yes, I only needed eight hundred thousand.

Because I owed my mom exactly that amount.

This figure was precisely calculated three days before I started university.

It was then that I learned every single expense of mine had been meticulously recorded.

A hair tie cost fifty cents, a school uniform a hundred and twenty, and living expenses at my aunt's house were eighteen hundred a month...

Even the number of toothpicks I used had a price tag.

Besides recording expenses, my mom kept track of grievances.

She even kept a 'grudge ledger, ' noting every slight.

In it, she noted the time I ate a pot of ribs, how I opposed my brother's birth, and how my reckless behavior led to the tragic deaths of my uncle's family.

My mom tallied up my expenses and added her worries, anger, and those recorded grudges.

After thorough calculation, she arrived at the figure of eight hundred thousand.

That day, my mom threw a thick hardcover notebook at my face.

"Look at you, living off me, yet becoming my enemy!

From today on, fend for yourself. You're an adult now, and I won't be taking care of you anymore. Also, remember you owe me eight hundred thousand for raising you!"

Back from the balcony, Laurie asked, "Sis, why were you sneaking around? Got a boyfriend?"

My mom snorted, her triangular eyes rolling at me.

"No one would seriously date her; she's only good for a casual fling!"

Sometimes, I really wished she wasn't my biological mother.

Maybe then it wouldn't hurt so much.

Just then, my mom seemed to remember something.

She turned to Laurie, her eyes smiling, "Sweetheart, when are you and Dustin getting engaged?"

My mom's expressions were like flipping a switch, harsh for me and sweet for my sister.

She switched seamlessly.

Laurie pouted, "His sister isn't well. She's having surgery soon, so we'll wait until after that."

Laurie had found herself a wealthy young man and was close to marriage.

Where's the justice in that?

Why does someone as naturally malicious as her sail smoothly, while someone like me can only struggle in the mire?

My mom patted Laurie's hand.

"Sweetheart, didn't you get your driver's license? Tomorrow, your aunt will give you an engagement gift. I calculated it; if we pay in full, that car will cost just over a hundred thousand!"

My hand paused as I wiped the floor.

I looked up at my mom and slowly spoke, my voice distant as if it wasn't my own.

"Mom, didn't you say we had no money?"

Half a year ago, after fainting three times in a week, my counselor forcibly sent me to the hospital.

Only then did I find out I had a tumor in my brain.

The doctor said surgery was urgent.

Back then, I called my mom.

"Mom, I'm sick. I need surgery, and it'll cost ten thousand. Could you lend it to me... "

But before I could explain further, my mom interrupted, "Where would we have the money?

Your cousin has had leg pain for months and hasn't seen a doctor. What's so special about a headache? Don't think you can trick me into giving you money, and don't forget you still owe me eight hundred thousand!"

So, they had no money to give me ten thousand for surgery but could afford to buy Laurie a car worth a hundred thousand?

My mom was enraged by my questioning.

She came over and snatched the dirty rag from my hand, slapping it across my face.

"Looking for money? Why not use your 'skills' at thieving? Can't steal any? Why not hit up your so-called boyfriends for cash?

Oh, I get it, you're not worth anything, right? Just good enough for free rides!"

Her mouth kept running.

Marked as a thief and worthless, those labels stuck with me.

Ten years now.

From middle school to high school, then university.

Classmates came and went, but my mom would bring it up now and then.

Because she wanted me to remember... for the rest of my life.