The Love That Faded Away

On our wedding night, Timothy Soloman tossed a pack of contraceptive pills at me once it was over.

"Amanda, you can't get pregnant."

My brows knitted together. "But there's nothing wrong with my body."

He shook his head. "That's not why.

"I have a son. He's already five. I married you, but I also promised her there wouldn't be a second child."

I felt like I'd been dropped into an ice cellar, my whole body shaking without end.

"Who is she? Why are you telling me this only now?" I asked.

"The girl you used to sponsor, the one who couldn't afford her tuition. She's been clinging to me, and I can't shake her loose.

"But don't worry. You're the only one in my heart. You will always be my lawfully wedded wife; no one else."

The marks Timothy had left on my body were still there. I looked down at the glaring red streaks across my skin, and I almost wanted to laugh at how absurd it all was.

"Timothy," I said. "Let's get a divorce."
Chapter 1
Timothy Soloman grabbed my wrist. "Is this really worth getting a divorce over?"
"I've given you everything I have: the title of Mrs. Soloman, more spending money than you could ever use, and I've even been searching for a bone marrow donor to save your brother's life.
"It's just a child. I never meant to hide it from you. Does it really matter that much?"
His brows furrowed, his displeasure plain.
I wrenched my arm free. "I want you to cut things off with Cathleen. Let her take that child and leave Ciscosta Bay for good. Otherwise, don't ever expect me to forgive you."
"He's my son, and I've raised him for five years. I can't bring myself to abandon him."
Timothy sighed and lit a cigarette. The smoke curled toward me, stinging my nose and stirring up a bitter ache in my chest.
Five years. We'd only been together for seven ourselves.
So in our second year together, he'd already been unfaithful, and he'd had a child with someone else.
Counting back, that was the same year my brother, Gary Castor, was diagnosed with leukemia.
The moment Timothy heard the news, he cut his business trip short and rushed home. He'd held me at the hospital while I shook with fear and kept telling me it would be fine.
"Gary will be okay. I'm here. I won't let anything happen to him."
Except he hadn't been on a business trip at all. He'd been off with his mistress while she gave birth to his son.
"Amanda, forgive me. Can we just put this behind us?"
Timothy crushed out his cigarette and stepped toward me, trying to pull me into his arms.
"I promise you won't ever be wronged like this again."
I pushed him away, pulled my clothes back on, and walked out without another word.
The night in Ciscosta Bay was cold, and a chill wind cut through it. The heat that anger had brought to my face faded fast in the cold.
I wandered the streets in a daze, not sure where I was even headed.
Years ago, my parents had passed away and left Gary and me with only each other. Then Timothy had come into my life, and I'd thought fate had finally decided to be kind to me. I'd truly believed he loved me enough to last a lifetime, that he'd never betray me.
Seven years later, and all I had to show for it was learning, on our wedding night, that he'd been cheating on me all along.
That was when my phone rang.
It was the caregiver.
"Ms. Castor, your brother's condition just took a turn for the worse. We're afraid he might not make it. He wouldn't let me call you. He said he didn't want to ruin your wedding night."
My chest clenched tight.
"I'm coming right now. Please, just take care of him."
By the time I reached the hospital, it took a long while before Gary finally came to. He looked terrible, his face pale as paper.
"Amanda, you came."
Seeing him like that, all the emotion I'd been holding back finally broke loose.
My voice cracked. "How could you be so foolish? You nearly died, and you still tried to hide it from me?"
"They can't find a matching donor. I could go any time. Don't be too sad, Amanda."
Gary gave a self-deprecating little laugh. "I won't be able to protect you anymore. It's a good thing Timothy really does care about you."
"Don't say that." Tears spilled down my face. "I'll find a way to get you that bone marrow."
I didn't want him to see me cry and make him feel worse, so I stepped out of the room and went to the hallway to collect myself.

Chapter 2
I didn't know how to tell Gary that Timothy and I were getting a divorce.
If I told him now, "Timothy isn't a decent man at all. He's had a child with someone else, and the boy is already five.
"And he won't even let me have children of my own. He wants me to help raise his illegitimate son instead."
I was afraid Gary's body couldn't take news like that.
Too much had happened tonight already. Even I still felt dazed.
Just then, a familiar voice called out from behind me. "Amanda, are you all right?"
I turned to find Timothy hurrying toward me, out of breath, a thick coat draped over his arm.
"You left in such a rush. I was worried, so I called Gary. When I heard you'd come to the hospital, I was relieved."
He said this as he tried to drape the coat over my shoulders.
"Tonight was my fault. Go see Gary. Don't let him worry, all right?"
Timothy's eyes were dark and heavy, as if he genuinely cared about me.
I turned my face away, refusing to meet his gaze.
For seven years, every time we'd argued, Timothy had looked at me with that same tender expression, and every time, I'd truly believed he cared about no one but me, and my anger would fade almost instantly.
Even now, he was still trying the same trick.
It wasn't going to work this time.
A moment later, he pulled me into the hospital room by force anyway.
Gary saw our hands locked together and let out a relieved breath.
"Amanda, I thought you two had a falling out. Good thing it's nothing."
I yanked my hand free of Timothy's, wondering how anyone could be so shameless.
He didn't seem to notice at all. He just sat himself down at Gary's bedside. "Let me peel you both some apples."
I couldn't take it anymore and drove him out of the room.
"Timothy, are you doing this on purpose? Don't show your face in front of me again until you've settled things with Cathleen."
I kept my voice low. "I'll take care of the divorce papers."
He just looked at me quietly.
"Even if I can find you a matching bone marrow donor? Even then, I still can't come near you?"
For a second, I froze where I stood.
Timothy went on. "Amanda, you know I've spent a whole year looking for a donor for Gary. I finally found one. They've agreed to come to Ciscosta Bay for the surgery in seven days.
"I've already paid them a considerable sum. If we back out now, all of that goes to waste."
Whatever else he was, Timothy really had put real effort into Gary's illness. He'd used every connection he had to track down a donor, more than I, his own sister, had managed on my own.
I hesitated.
Timothy smiled and leaned in to kiss me. "Amanda, I knew you'd soften up. I've arranged for the bone marrow. In return, promise me you'll help raise that child."
This time, I didn't push him away.
But the ache and bitterness inside me never went away.
"Go home. I want to stay with Gary by myself."
After a while, Timothy let go of me, breathing unsteadily, a trace of desire still lingering in his eyes.
"Amanda, tonight is our wedding night. Come home with me."
Only after I refused him again and again did he finally give up. He left the hospital, clearly unwilling.
I straightened my clothes and went back into the room. "Your surgery is happening. There's hope. In seven days, someone's going to donate bone marrow for you."
Gary had been putting on a brave face this whole time just so I wouldn't worry. But at those words, he finally let his guard down completely.
"Amanda, I get to live... I get to protect you for the rest of your life."
I wiped the tears from his cheeks, and something that had been broken inside me finally started to mend.
As long as Gary lived, even if it meant spending the rest of my life in a marriage that existed in name only, I was willing to pay that price.

Chapter 3
I never expected that after I turned him down, Timothy would go straight to Cathleen Rosenstein instead.
I was just about to lie down on the empty bed beside Gary's when her taunting message came through.
Cathleen: [Amanda, tonight's your wedding night, and yet Timothy came to keep me company instead. You're not mad, are you?]
She'd sent along a few photos: Timothy sprawled on top of her, fast asleep with a thoroughly satisfied look on his face, his bare chest marked with a few faint scratches. It wasn't hard to guess how intense things had gotten between them just before.
Me: [Cathleen, do you have any shame left at all?]
Me: [You couldn't even afford your own tuition. I used the money I'd saved from part-time jobs to help you. And this is how you pay me back?]
The Cathleen I used to know had been naive, sheltered from the world. We'd met through a club activity in school. She used to trail after me, calling me "Sis" all the time, and something about it always reminded me of my sickly little brother, who was just as obedient and sweet. So I'd gone out of my way to look after her.
I never imagined I'd end up helping someone so ungrateful.
Her reply came quickly.
Cathleen: [Sis, I just love seeing you angry.]
Cathleen: [I used to wonder why you always got to act so effortlessly composed, why you could hand over a small fortune to help me out without even blinking.]
Cathleen: [Meanwhile, I nearly had to work as a hostess at some club just to make ends meet.]
There was a faint smugness in her tone now.
Cathleen: [Then I saw your rich boyfriend, and I understood exactly what your composure was built on. Since you're so kindhearted, I figured you wouldn't mind letting me bask in a little of that good fortune too, don't you agree?]
I sat there holding my phone, not sure whether to laugh or cry. A good deed I'd once been proud of had, in Cathleen's eyes, somehow become the final straw that finished off whatever conscience she'd had left.
Me: [Do whatever you want.]
I texted back, then deleted and blocked her without another word.
A person like that was a parasite. Once Timothy got tired of her, where would she even go?
I thought that would be the end of it, that I'd cut all ties with her.
But the very next day, she showed up at the hospital room, claiming she was delivering a meal.
By the time I got back with Gary's nutrition meal, she'd already been feeding him herself.
"Amanda, Timothy arranged this special meal delivery service for me. You won't have to run out for food every day anymore." My foolish brother grinned, delighted. "Timothy really does dote on you. He's even worried about you tiring yourself out buying meals."
"That really is something to envy," Cathleen added, watching me with a smile, her voice full of false agreement.
I had no idea what she was really doing there. But the moment I laid eyes on her, my stomach turned with revulsion.
"Get out and tell Timothy I don't need this."
I stared at Cathleen coldly. "I'm not an invalid. I can buy my own food. He doesn't need to trouble himself over it."
Just yesterday, I'd told myself I could tolerate Timothy, as long as it meant Gary got to live. But he only kept pushing further.
Gary, not understanding what was going on, looked at me in confusion.
"Amanda, why are you upset? Did you and Timothy fight? It's not because of me, is it?"
Gary was too perceptive for his own good, and I was afraid he'd figure out something was wrong. So I grabbed Cathleen by the arm and pulled her outside.
"We need to talk. Now."
She didn't resist at all, a faint smile still playing at the corners of her mouth as I dragged her away.
"You care about your brother so much. I knew coming here was the right move.
"I know exactly what Timothy's planning. Once you've finally accepted things, he'll take my child and hand him over for you to raise. But I'm the boy's real mother. How could I ever bear to let him go?"
There was something terrifying and unhinged flickering in Cathleen's eyes.
"If you agree to divorce Timothy, I'll make sure Gary lives peacefully until his surgery is over. Otherwise, he. will. die."

Chapter 4
Cathleen's voice had dropped deliberately low on those last few words, and it shattered the last of my composure.
Without a second's hesitation, I slapped her across the face.
"Touch Gary, and I'll bury you right alongside him. I don't want your bastard son. Whoever wants to raise him is welcome to."
Cathleen's cheek swelled instantly, blood and spit flying from the blow.
She didn't get angry. Instead, she grabbed my hand and used it to slap herself, once, twice, three times, over and over.
"You're right to scold me. I have no shame, and I betrayed you. I deserve to be hit.
"But my child is innocent. Please, I'm begging you, give him a chance to live."
By the time I realized something was wrong, Timothy was already standing in front of me, his face dark with fury.
"Amanda!" He seized my wrist and shoved me backward, hard. "That's enough out of you. Cathleen only came here because she recognized her mistake. She wanted to make things right with you.
"How could you just hit her like that, and threaten a child on top of it?"
I lost my footing and fell hard, a sharp jolt of pain shooting through my spine.
"Timothy, she grabbed my hand and used it to hit herself. Are you blind?" I hissed through the pain.
But Timothy wasn't listening to a word of it.
He only reached out, gently cupping Cathleen's face, murmuring in comfort, "Don't be scared. I'm here now. Nothing's going to happen to our son."
Cathleen swallowed her tears obediently and told Timothy to take her away.
That was when Gary, hearing the commotion, came out of the room.
"Amanda!" His heart clenched at the sight of me sitting on the floor. "Are you okay?"
But his eyes landed on Timothy and Cathleen's arms wrapped tightly around each other, and in an instant, he understood everything.
Timothy was cheating.
"You slut! How dare you bully my sister!"
Furious, Gary lunged at Cathleen, trying to stand up for me. But before his hand ever reached her, Timothy kicked him hard in the stomach.
He crashed to the floor right in front of me, his catheter bag and IV line tearing loose and scattering across the ground.
"Noooo," I choked out, my chest tearing apart. I scrambled over to check on Gary, tears streaming down my face without end.
Timothy only hesitated for a second before coldly tossing out a single word, "Serves him right."
Then he wrapped his arm around Cathleen and walked away.
Something in me died completely in that moment.
Because of that kick, Gary needed a long emergency surgery just to come back to consciousness. And even then, his condition kept deteriorating.
"Amanda, don't cry."
He didn't even have the strength left to wipe my tears away anymore.
"Don't go after him for my sake. Don't beg someone who's already hurt you."
Gary could always read what was on my mind. He wouldn't let himself fall asleep until he'd stubbornly forced me to promise.
I nodded through my tears, but the moment I stepped outside, I took a cab straight to Timothy's.
He was lounging in an indoor hot spring with Cathleen, the mood between them anything but innocent.
He wasn't even surprised to see me storm in.
"Come here to beg for help? I heard about Gary's condition. So, what do you want to do about it?"
Timothy took a slow sip of red wine, watching me with something close to amusement.
I forced the words out. "If you can move up the bone marrow transplant, I'll agree to anything you want."
"Then get on your knees and beg Cathleen for forgiveness."
I saw Cathleen already lifting her phone, ready to film it, and my breath caught in my chest.
Did my dignity matter?
It did.
But Gary's life mattered more.
I steeled myself, dropped to my knees, and bowed my head to the floor in front of Cathleen. "I'm sorry. Please forgive me."
It wasn't long before my phone started ringing off the hook.
A nurse I knew well, her voice thick with tears, spoke through the line. "Ms. Castor, Gary pulled out his own IV. He's not going to make it.
"He got a video on his phone of you kneeling. He wanted me to make sure you knew: never kneel for him again..."